Friday, April 13, 2012

Apache vs Aztec Jaguar


Beginning Analysis: What happens when a guerilla from the southwest takes on Central America's most lethal holy warrior? Read on to see who...is...deadliest!?

Apache
Short Range: Tomahawk
Medium Range: War Lance
Long Range: Apache Bow & Arrow
Special: Apache Knife

Aztec Jaguar
Short Range: Stone Axe
Medium Range: Maquahuitl
Long Range: Aztec Bow & Arrow
Special: Tlacochtli Spear & Atlatl Launcher

Who Got the Edge
Tomahawk vs Stone Axe: The Tomahawk gets the edge. It addition to being a thrown weapon as well as a up close weapon, the Tomahawk was made from a variety of materials. The Stone Axe was generally not thrown, and was made with only one material.
War Lance vs Maquahuitl: The Maquahuitl get the edge. While the War Lance can inflict devastating piercing wounds, it doesn't quite have the raw cutting & bludgeoning that the Maquahuitl has. On top of that, the obsidian bits broken in the wounds would make healing difficult, if not impossible.
Apache Bow & Arrow vs Aztec Bow & Arrow: Both bows get the edge. The Apaches used a variety of materials for their arrow tips, including rusted metal, stone, and obsidian if they could find it. On top of that, the bow was using from on horseback or on foot. With the Aztec's obsidian arrow tips, they could inflict wounds that were almost impossible to heal (look above for a similar example).
Apache Knife vs Tlacochtli Spear & Atlatl Launcher: The Apache Knife gets the edge. Although the Tlacochtli has a far greater range, it can only (effectively) be used as a ranged weapon. With the knife, you can use it up close, as well as throw it.

Setup
It was a warm, summer afternoon in the foothills of the great plains. The skies were clear, and the sun was shining brightly. In a small thicket, an Apache indian was cleaning the blood of of his personal knife. Earlier in the day, he had been hunting in the woods for some food to bring back to his tribe, when he had run into some kind of strange, armored savage. He had tried to communicate with this person, but was instead under attack by him. After a few minutes, the Apache had finally managed to disarm his attacker, and sent his knife right across the brute's throat.
The Apache finished cleaning his knife, and placed it back into it's sheathe. He walked to a tree right behind him, and picked up his other weapons: His bow and arrow, his War Lance, and two iron Tomahawks. He then started back towards the open field he was wandering earlier. Hopefully, there would be a deer walking around that would provide his tribe with at least a day's worth of food. Gripping his bow, and pulling out a barbed arrow, he sent out on a hunt that will help preserve his tribe.
He finally stepped out onto the field, and saw a unusual sight. Right in the middle of the field was a freshly slain deer, with an arrow still stuck inside the animal's head. Cautious, but curious, the Apache crept towards the corpse to inspect it. Sure enough, the carcass was real, as was the arrow in the skull. He pulled it out, and saw that the tip was composed of obsidian, a stone that he himself sometimes used on his own arrows. The animal hasn't been dead for long, the Apache thought to himself. Maybe 2 hourse, at the least. Blessing the spirits above, he put his bow over his shoulder, and the barbed arrow back into the quiver, and picked up the deer carcass. That was when he heard the whistling.
Two arrows came flying in, and hit the deer corpse right in the abdomen. The Apache immediately set down the body, and took off his bow. He scanned the horizon, and saw nobody. However, he did see some shaking going off in some bushes ahead of him. Taking out a rusted arrow, he knocked the bow, and fired. The arrow flew with the grace of the wind, and went right into the bushes. The shaking stopped, and the Apache ran right in to investige who, or what, attacked him.
When he got behind the bushes, the Apache didn't find whoever it was that attacked him. He did spot a smoldering fire underneath a tree, with smoke rising up into the sky, and embers still glowing. There was meat of some kind on a stick right next to the fire, all nice and cooked. As the Apache was reaching for the stick, someone right above him jumped down, yelling and screaming like a wildman.
The Apache gripped his War Lance, and gave himself some distance from his attacker. He was quite the interesting individual. He wore a cotton shirt of some kind, with a colorful sash across his shoulder, and he had two cotton slipper shoes. What was most intriguing was the wooden helmet. It was shaped like an exotic cat, with dots painted all over, and eyes painted right above the wearer's own. The Apache never saw someone like this before, and suspected that this person was from a tribe he'd never encountered before. He had to be one his toes, since he didn't know how his attacker fought.
The attacker began swinging around a heavy wooden club, and the Apache noticed that it was lined with obsidian edges, much like the arrows that were shot into the deer carcass. In response, the Apache thrusted his War Lance back and forth, keeping his attacker at a far distance. This went on for an extra moment or two, until the attacker came down upon the Apache with a tremendous amount of force, and the club broke the War Lance into two pieces. Startled by the display of brute force, the Apache drew his knife, and retreated to a better position. His attacker followed suit, still gripping the bladed club.
A couple minutes later, and the Apache found himself in some thick woods. He could hear his attacker running towards him, so he put his knife into his mouth, and climbed up the nearest tree to get a better vantage point. Sure enough, his attacker came running in, still holding onto his obsidian-edged club. The Apache jumped down just as his attacker was right below him. He let out his war cry, and pounced his attacker. He came down with the force of a hawk, and knocked his attacker's club out of his hands.
The attacker got up off of his feet, and before he could reach for his club, a knife flew right into his shoulder. The pain stopped him right in his tracks, and he wasn't used to pain. His opponent's moment of inaction gave the Apache an opening to land a final killing blow, he drew one of his Tomahawks, raised it, and let the weapon fly. It flew right towards it's target, and just when it was about to hit, the Apache's attacker knocked it out of the air with what looked like an axe made out of stone. This individual just won't lie down, the Apache thought. Taking out his last Tomahawk, he ran again from his attacker. He was gaining some good ground, when he felt something got right through his arm. He fell to his knees, and looked at his arm. Going right through it was a long, arrow-shaped spear, with a black tip still in one piece. The Apache put down his weapon, and began taking the spear out, which was a painful process. Meanwhile, his attacker was walking towards him, gripping his Stone Axe, and raised it high above his head to send it into the Apache's head. He was within range of the Apache's head, when the Apache suddenly pulled the spear out, and swiftly grabbed the Tomahawk. He swung it at his attacker's torso, and for a moment, his opponent stood still. A second later, he dropped his Stone Axe, and his guts spilled out from the wound. The Apache got back to his feet, and saw his opponent lying in a pool of blood and organs. It was a gristly, yet satisfying sight.

Apache: 653
Tomahawk: 200
War Lance: 53
Apache Bow & Arrow: 200
Apache Knife: 200

Aztec Jaguar: 347
Stone Axe: 13
Maquahuitl: 240
Aztec Bow & Arrow: 47
Tlacochtli Spear & Atlatl Launcher: 40

Ending Assessment: The Apache was better as setting ambushes, had weapons that could be used from multiple distances, and were made from better materials.
Strongest Weapon: Despite being the loser, the Aztec's Maquahuitl, with it's 240 kills, is the strongest weapon of this fight.
Weakest Weapon: With a measly 13 kills, the Aztec's Stone Axe takes the weakest weapon spot.

4 comments:

  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I believe the Apache never used a War Lance. That was a weapon the Comanche used, not the Apache. Also, the bow and arrow was the Aztec Eagle's weapon, not the Aztec Jaguar's weapon.

    ReplyDelete
  3. erwin rommel vs bernard montgomery,miyamoto musashi vs achilles ( real life)

    ReplyDelete